10.2.09

After they broke up, she continued to send him things in the mail occasionally. Nothing big– CD’s she made of favorite music, new books she read and liked, small stuff. She did it simply because she thought he would like them too and she wanted to share even though they no longer had contact. According to the rules of romance you’re not supposed to do that after you’ve stopped seeing someone, but who made those rules? She had loved him and they were very happy once. Wasn’t that reason enough to send things now and then that she believed would make him glad? They had gotten along so well when they were together, she was certain he would understand now why she did it. I liked this and I think you will too. I remember the things you liked. That’s all. Nothing more or less. I hope you enjoy it. But he didn’t understand. Eventually he wrote her a short curt note saying “I don’t know how to feel about these things you’ve been sending me.” Once they’d told each other real secrets about themselves and confessed to weaknesses they tried to hide from the rest of the world. For a short blessed time, they’d felt both safe and at home with one another. Despite that intimacy, now she had become only a stranger bearing gifts and of course we should always be suspicious of them.

jonathan carroll

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